70 years ago, persecuted by the Pakistani military because of his religion, my father fled his ancestral village in Bangladesh and became a refugee at the age of 10. This year, I became a C-suite executive at a Fortune 500 company, leading data and AI/ML for Opendoor. The American Dream is real, but it isn’t quite what you think it is.
Some people think as long as you work hard and follow the rules, you’ll make it. You’ll hear them say that this generation is lazy or that others are taking advantage of the system. They say you need to pull yourself up by your bootstraps.
Others reject the American Dream as a nepotistic nightmare. You’ll hear them say that it’s not what you know, it’s who you know. They say the system is stacked against you.
Yet others say it’s all just luck.
I disagree. Over the last 20 years, here’s what I’ve learned:
American Dream = Hard Work * Big Bets
But here’s the twist: You don’t get to make the big bets, your teachers, bosses and friends do. I’ve worked hard and taken some risks, sure, but if it weren’t for people I admired being willing to bet on me, none of it would’ve mattered.
When I was struggling with depression in high school, sleeping through classes and failing exams, Mr. Z and Mr. Murray took me aside and told me about “potential.” (They gave me the inspiring version. Later, I learned that “has potential” is how teachers describe kids who are wasting their potential.) At a time I was being put into remedial math classes, they staged an intervention and taught me that second chances exist.
At Berkeley, I discovered statistical models — it was love at first sight. I worked hard, working two jobs and taking every class I could find on AI/ML, computer science and statistics. But ultimately, it was Lior Pachter who bet on 19-year-old me and gave me my first big chance: working on the Human Genome Project, helping write some of the foundational systems and models. Getting to see Lior in action, alongside Richard Karp, Eric Xing and Michael Jordan, was mesmerizing. They taught me how to think systematically about the world and that math can be beautiful.
Around Amazon, Kim Rachmeler, Jeff Holden, Joel Spiegel, Karen Van Dusen and Rick Dalzell took me under their wing. Leading a $1B+ data team — the original Amazon personalization engine — at the age of 22 was no small feat and I was more than a little cocky. As a kid who’d walked to school on streets where you didn’t wear red, they showed me a totally different world — the corporate boardroom — with its own unique characters, customs and culture. They taught me good leadership habits and about the speed of innovation.
In startups, I found a brotherhood of channeled intensity. Hadi Partovi, Rich Barton, Mitch Kapor, Mike Murray, Dave Peery and Vinod Khosla bet on an intense kid with a big idea. Glenn Kelman, Geoff Davis, Jim Fruchterman and Sebastien de Halleux showed me I wasn’t alone in my intensity, and by example showed me who I could be. Tim O’Reilly, Saar Gur and Auren Hoffman unveiled to me a world of thought leadership that I didn’t know existed and then invited me into it. And for the first time, I learned how people, strategy and emotions can work together: Olivia Fox Cabane taught me that the whole is bigger than the sum of parts, and that true leadership means inspiring hearts as well as minds. I wasn’t ready for all of it but, when I needed it most, I finally understood. They all taught me I wasn’t alone.
At Opendoor, Daniel Morillo and Raji Subramanian saw something — ”potential,” perhaps 😉 — and not only created opportunities for me but also pushed me to continually focus on the fundamentals. I will forever have Daniel’s “just stare out a window for 10 minutes” and Raji’s “why, what and how” imprinted in my brain. Only with time will I be able to fully understand what I’ve been learning from them (and fully express my gratitude). Daniel and Raji taught me that simplicity wins, even (and especially) at the highest levels.
Looking back, I’m not sure anyone ever bet on my father. He arrived in this country with an engineering degree but worked as a night watchman for years because no one would hire a brown man. He doesn’t talk about his past much, but from what I’ve pieced together, he and my mother had to do it all themselves.
In recent years, I’ve tried to repay the favor. Although I still do some research and engineering, these days I’m more coach than player. Both technically and managerially, my role today is to see how things might play out several moves ahead and coach my leaders through the right choices today. I joke that a lot of my job reduces to “I’ve seen this movie before, you don’t like how it ends — do something different.” In that capacity, I’ve gotten to work with dozens of emerging leaders, from startup founders to corporate executives and technical leaders. I’m incredibly excited to see what the future holds for them.
Among other things, if we play our cards right, this generation of artificial intelligence will revolutionize whole industries, both for Opendoor and beyond. Having lived through the last three AI winters, I’ve seen this kind of movie before. There are many similarities: there is a lot of snake oil and many of us are seeing worrying signals in the leading indicators. However, for the first time, for select players in strategic use cases, I believe the emergent capabilities outweigh the hype.
At least for my family, the American Dream was possible. In a single generation, we went from being refugees to leaders. Sure, I worked hard and took some risks, but so did others; the difference was that a few people were willing to bet on me. In any other country, our story wouldn’t have been possible.
This Thanksgiving, what am I thankful for? The American Dream and the many people over the years who’ve bet on me. Thank you.
And most of all, to my Baba — thank you for making that original bet and boarding that plane to the United States of America, and for the countless times you’ve doubled down on that bet with me since then.
Baba, Mommom and 5-year-old (and 15-year-old) me. (Mommom deserves her very own post and that one I’m saving for another time.)